It’s morning, I’ve just opened my eyes. The light is already pouring into the room in full streams, and yet it’s cold. I step into the shower and warm water runs down my hair, warming my shoulders, my chest. The aches my body had already taken as its own are leaving me. It’s amazing to feel this comfortable, even if just for a moment. But why has the feeling of loneliness disappeared too? After all, I’m standing here alone, wrapped in nothing but water. And yet I feel happiness. Pampering. Maybe there’s a lot of happiness in the world, we just don’t see it – because we’re always chasing something.
I experience it every day, but only now do I fully realize it. Maybe it’s enough just to be. To be present, to reflect on how to bring ourselves joy. What is the meaning of life? I’ve been searching for it for a long time. Most of the time, this question ends in sadness and the image of a partner. Not today. Today, the water gave me everything I needed. And I am content. Does that mean I’m capable of living happily on my own? Maybe yes. At least today, the meaning of my life is my happiness. And I hope it stays that way for a long time.
It’s almost September, it will be cold. And it’s precisely in the cold that one realizes how precious warmth is. I’m looking forward to winter, which I’ve hated all my life – because I know it will be easy to feel joy. With a shower like today. Or with warm cocoa. Today is a day for me. I’ll go to the hotel for a coffee, listen to their quiet music, and enjoy what life has given me.
We often see life as dim and ask why there isn’t more light in it. But maybe it’s meant to be that way. Melancholy gives us the chance to feel beauty when it arrives. After all, it’s in the dimness that we see the sunbeams most clearly. You know that feeling, when you’re cold and only one ray of sunlight comes through the window? You step into it and feel its warmth.
And aren’t our loved ones like those rays? Do we enjoy their presence, or do we let it slip through our fingers like this morning water? Dimness is almost darkness. And in the dark, we can see stars. So let’s look for our stars, let ourselves be warmed by their light. And every day, let’s give ourselves a moment when we allow ourselves to be happy. Just like that.